Death and egotism

Our enneagram style is an ego - state. It is our default position when we face stress or difficulties of any variety. I'm a 7, under stress, I tend to seek escape. Whereas, under the same stress, an 8 might get angry and start blaming or taking dramatic action.

One secret conceit of our ego style is that we have an answer. Our ability to deal with unknowing or powerlessness is always an overcoming of our ego.

One of the sickest, most egotistical manifestations of collective egotism is the religious formulation of answers to everything. The book of Job is a detailed refutation of people who have all the answers. In Job's case, the answers were to why we suffer. For 35 chapters, Job's friends give him platitudes; he is suffering because he sinner is their theme. Job is willing to live with unknowing. Job is a spiritual giant.

Jim's wife, Catherine, sent us an e mail telling us she is bringing in hospice - the people who will help her die. I probably won't get to talk to her before she does. I would not tell her about heaven. What shall I say then? I would tell her a parable. "Once there were twins in the womb and one of them said, 'I'm going out of here to the other side.' The other twin grew anxious and said, 'That's crazy. You know we can't live without this cord that feeds us. We've always been happy here, why would you leave? Nobody has ever come back!'
Nonetheless, the first twin said, "I'm going." And did.

My grandson Lucas is now 9 months old and is new to this world. Ten months ago he never could have predicted that he would want to jump, laugh when tickled properly, eat carrots and pet little dogs. He never would have believed it. Who can blame him?

Whatever is on the other side of this life is probably as different as the lives before and after birth. I don't know what the grand plan is, but I'll try to live with not knowing. We could all start practicing that here and now. Only egotists have final answers to the big questions.