Get real

At one time or another I've done therapy, coaching and spiritual direction. Is there much real difference?
Only in resources and context.
A lot of religious writing and traditions talk smoothly about spirituality. I think that is a good thing. The coaching sites usually promise a felicitous combination of prosperity and happiness. I think those are good things.
People looking for spiritual direction usually come in search of virtue. In moderation I am in favor of virtue.

I don't promise and can't deliver any of those things. Perhaps my promise is captured best in a brief story. Houston Smith, the famous comparative religion author tells of his experience taking his Zen students to Japan to meet a famous Zen teacher who had a small group of intense disciples. The master walked into the assembled class and asked abruptly, "Why do you want to study here?" One graduate student responded that he understood there were some things about Zen that could only be learned by experience, not from books. Houston Smith said he thought was a good answer, but the Zen master was gruffly disapproving. So the student asked, "Well, what is the reason to study Zen?" The master's answer was brief and clear: "To see things as they are."

When I coach or try to heal or direct, the purpose of all three disciplines is to become more real. Within the enneagram tradition that starts with seeing things --especially ourselves -- clearly and then trying to become more real.

I received two unusual compliments on my coaching last month. One woman pronounced my help "yummy," which I thought was delightful! But the best compliment was from a man who refused to talk to me because he told my partner, Marie, "he is too real."
Well, the mission was not accomplished, but he did understand the mission.

More later. This will be a recurring theme.